How many graves to dig?

"Vengence is mine, saith the Lord, I shall repay." -- Quote from the KJV Bible.

"Before setting out for revenge, Dig two graves" -- Chineese Proverb.

"Before going after someone in the act of Revenge or Vengence against somone who turned a friend against you, dig three graves" -- Quote unknown.

G'day everyone.

Vengeance or Revenge. What should you decide to do? More importantly, how should you act when you find out that someone has convinced a friend to go against against you, or you against your friend? It depends on how bad the situation is and for what reason.

Way back in the early 1980s, a religious pastor turned me against my hearing girlfriend I had. He convinced me that I would be better off to marry a deaf girl. But 12 years and trying to be married to one of the 3 deaf women (which I wanted to marry), whom he turned each of them against me? He should have quit while he was ahead. It wasn't long before I became a part of a group that later brought him down from his position. When I went back to apologize to my hearing girlfriend, I found out that she nearly destroyed her life. She was too crippled to recognize me. That was my sorrow.

In the early 2000s, another pastor made a same mistake of turning my last girlfriend, whom I wanted to marry, against me. While he was celebrating, he found he lost the right to teach in the local college classrooms for free. He should have been more careful. He ought to be thankful he didn't lose his job.

Another person has turned a best friend of mine against me a few months ago. I was very devastated. How and why? I don't know. But this time, I wanted my former best friend to meet me in a public place so that we can sit down and talk it out rather than wasting time and anger in the emails, IMs, and VPs. I wanted to solve it out. I wanted to find out what the other person said to him against me. But if he refuses and waits till the judgement day to come, 3 people will be heartbroken at the very outcome that wasn't really resolved. Why wait? 3 graves are already dug right now. How scary is that?

So for whatever reason you decide to influence a person to go against their best friend, or friend, or family, go out and dig 3 graves. Because eventually, one friend will find out what you did and plot revenge on you. The other person (the hurt party) will find out as well and most likely decide to do vengeance. Yours will be the grave of sorrow because you wish you never turned two people against each other. Whatever reason you had to turn two people against each other, you better hope they talk together in person and sincerely forgive each other before they come after you.

Lastly, it's not nice to blame someone else for your problems in life. But take responsibility for what are and run with that. Simple as it is.

Semper Fi.