Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Tell the truth if someone's dying.

G'day Everyone!

First read this link:
http://www.parentdish.com/2009/09/08/mother-never-told-dying-daughter-end-was-near/

This is what I hate about parents who don't want to deliver the awful life ending news to a kid of their own. Any kid from 13 years old and on up, is mature enough to know to hear of what's going on in their lives around them. Every kid ought to be warned every day that they are NOT indestructible as they think they are. They are fragile kids.

But when a parent doesn't tell their own kid about their kid's impending death, I think they have done a disservice to them. More importantly, it's murder of kindness. To hide something for so long to keep their kid worry free of the world, I disagree. When a kid dies unexpectedly, I feel that this kid must have felt not only a betrayal of trust of their parent, but being unprepared for what happens when death comes for them. How ugly does it get? Very.

Just like the chick tract I posted below in my blog (beneath the poll, or better yet, go to Link:
http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0001/0001_01.asp), that's called "this was your life".
It gives you a clear understanding and warning of what happens to every soul in the world that dies, unprepared. Every soul on earth faces Jesus. Life is recorded as it is. Without Jesus Christ as a savior, no body gets into heaven because of sin. I feel this young girl was unprepared for her own death. Her mother must have thought by leaving her unprepared for death, God would have mercy on her. Sadly, she is mistaken. How interesting will she react when she finds out about her daughter when she dies herself.

A dozen years ago, an old family doctor of my dad's refused to tell my father that he was dying of an aggressive form of lung cancer. He told my dad this: "Everything is fine with you". It wasn't until a problem at home had to make him to go to the hospital for treatment. That is where the next doctor realized my dad's aggressive form of lung cancer also. BUT, she didn't want to upset my dad as well. So she told my dad, "Don't worry, it's a SLOW growing lung cancer". Everyone thought the doctor was right that my dad had time to plan his life's options for the cure of lung cancer. Only did I feel he wasn't preparing for the unexpected course of events to happen. I tried to discuss it with him. But he said "I trust the doctors, and I trust the Catholic Church".

Several months later, another hospital event happened. This time, a different doctor made the RIGHT and TRUTHFUL DECISION to tell my dad the awful news: "You got an aggressive form of lung cancer. I don't know why the previous doctor and your old doctor didn't tell you this sooner! I don't like what I see of it.". I looked on the shocked face of my father. They were going to start chemotherapy right away in the next morning. But, it would be that very night that my father would die of this lung cancer. I'm sure he was shocked by the betrayal of both his doctors and the church.

In the weeks after that, I had courage to ask the hospital to dismiss the doctor that failed to tell my dad the awful truth in the first place. She spoke to say that she wasn't going to upset my dad. I told her "It is better to prepare a patient for their last days on earth rather than letting them die unexpectedly. My father trusted you and in this health care system. You, that represents that health care system itself, FAILED him.". The hospital dismissed her completely from the job. She took another job in another state till she got fired there as well.

My dad's old doctor didn't take the news well when the state of PA acted on my complaint to revoke his license. He died unexpectedly. Another doctor examined his all of his records of patients and several had to be "rescued" from impending deaths. Most were saved and cured.

Not too long ago, when I talked with my current doctor, I told him "Doctor, I want you to know that I TRUST YOU NOT TO BETRAY ME. But DO TELL ME THE TRUTH if I have something of a serious situation that might end my life. By telling me the truth, it is so that I can prepare for events to come.". He looked at me and realized that I was very serious about it.

I don't want to die unexpected. But prepared for it, I am. I could die any day God determines of. Same as you are, my dear reader. Remember my post, "Live as if Dying". http://thedeafsherlock.blogspot.com/2009/06/live-as-if-dying.html .

Semper Fi.

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